my wife and I never have sex. Maybe once a month, it sucks. I keep trying to get her in the mood but she never gets there. The other night in bed I noticed something odd going on her side of the bed. She was masturbating in our bed right next to me. She thought I was asleep. Come to find out she does this quite often when she thinks I’m asleep. She just didn’t want to have sex with me. ~FML
Before my divorce my exwife and I went to counseling. The very first appointment he told us that “Nothing was going to change” “Thangs will always be this way”… What a Dick… so later he tells us to make a short outline of what our problems were with one another. so the next day I write this little page of the things I had a problem with and head to the next appointment. My now exwife is there and gives me a 40 page typed outline of all the things she has wrong with me… F@$%…. Ya… that didn’t go over so well. The next week she took my kids and moved out. I’m not a bad guy but God does love to piss on my life.
~FML
okay soo i went to a party with my cuz and his friends there 21 and im 16 well anyways i went with them and i was drikin really hard and i got sick well one of my sisters friends were there and saw me go to the bath room and one of my cuzins friends went in there with me so he could hold my hair so 20 30 mins go by and we came out and now by this time my sisters friend called my sister and told her that i fucked a 21 year old one of my cuzin friends soo my sister comes to the party and strats yelling at me and my cuz and his friend and my sisters boyfriend is a state policesmen and my sister boyfriend came and arrested for have havein sex with me when he didnt and now hes n jail and he didnt do a damn thing what do i do??? FML
im black FML
This site used to be funny and intead it has turned into a bunch of shit. I was having a bad day and was expecting this to cheer me up and it just made me feel more depressed…..FML
i was sitting in class today.. the girl behind me has the biggest boobs… i got hard so quick!! i was in schooll!!
so i ate this girl out… wen i went down it smelled like friend chicken!!!!! FML
so i finally meet the guy of my dreams and hes in my science class, we flirted and i knew he liked me, then he gets back together with his ex who cheated on him and shes not even in the same school…now when i see him in the hall instead of smiling he just looks at me FML!!!!!!