I DONT WANNA FUCKING GO

I DONT WANNA GO ON VACATION FOR 3 WEEKS WITH MY ANNOYING ASS FAMILY ITS GONNA BE FUCKING HELL I WANT TO BE WITH MY FRIENDS :/

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My lost soul.

Where do I start…
I was borned in Philippines in 1995 and lived a poor but a very happy life with my relatives and my dear mum. My American father left my mum before I was born so I’ve never seen him in my life and I’m 16.

Another man came to our street and fell in love with my mum once again. They got together and married and he becamed my step father.
In 2003 we moved to Australia to live with my new dad, I was sad to leave my home and my friends, relatives etc. But I had no choice.

Now, ever since I moved here. My life has sucked dramatically. I’ve even been to counselling coz I’m depressed 24/7 and it’s all thanks to my ignorant, fun – depleting little faggot dad. He has made my life so bad that I want to run away sometimes or even kill myself. He has squeezed everything out of me and expects me to be good at school and do things for the future that I never want do.

Every single day I’m scared of him and avoid him as much as I can.

We went to Philippines for a holiday. And Boy was it nothing like I imagined. Every second I spent there my heart had wings and it literally felt like my problems just vanished. I was addicted to this drug called “happiness” and I felt like I belonged for once in my life. My flame inside me has long been extinguished but it was bright as ever.

We returned to Australia and instantly my happiness dissappeared. I hate my life so much I just want to run away back to Philippines once I’m legal. Idc if I’m poor at least I’m away from him and that I am happy. So many years of pain and anguish. I cry myself to sleep every night hoping to wake up in my old room back in Phillipines.. But never happens.. My dreams don’t come true… Not while I’m here.

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Daddy

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing in my room. My father walked past the window with an axe in the hand. Five times. VDM

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Why do I ever bother!!!

so I go to my aunts, to sled with my cusins, and first my two older cusins go down the hill,aka road, then me my cusin and little cusin go down the hill, and then i see my older cousnins,their off their sleds and standing in the middle of the road,soon my cusin says heres the fun part, and my older cusins stop the sled, then my cusin and little cusin get out of the sled and thrown into the snow, i relize whats happenin and try to go in the snow bank my self, but one of my older cousnins comes over and says well well look here logan we have a wimp and he takes me out of the snow bank and back in only this time face first and i try and struggle to get up but i couldent cause he was holding my face in the snow and soon I couldnt breath of lack of oxeygen, and finaly he lets me free, then I ran back up the hill crying and went inside to the bathroom and empteyd the frozen snow balls in my hair into the tub, then soon my aunt comes and says what happend to you? and she can be the biggest b**** in the world! and I told her what happend (ps this was when i was 8) and all she says is OH SHUT UP AND MAN UP! so I told my mom what had happend and she did nothing about it…. FML!

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Not easy

..I just recently moved into foster care. I haven’t gotten a place to live yet, they’re still looking. I moved out from my dad cuz he’s drinking and stuff.. I can’t live with my mom cuz she’s sick (deadly sick). She lives far away from me, but I USED to visit her every summer, easter and christmas. She remarried this guy, and he has a son, Adrian. Adrian raped me from I was 7 till I was 13. (I’m turning 15 in April.) My mom is visiting them now, and Adrian told my mom that he was gonna move up here where I live, to join military. I, of course, am so freaking scared! And I don’t even like the family I’m currently living with, (good luck for me, it is just temporarily).
Y’all probably think I’m being a drama queen, but it’s hard not to be scared. It’s hard not to think about it.
My whole life is just hard.

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I HATE MY MOM!

I FREAKING HATE MY PARENTS THEY DONT APPRECIATE WHAT I DO I WIN AN AWARD EH GOOD FOR YOU THE ONLY TIME MY PARENTS WERE ACTUALLY PROUD OF ME IS WHEN I BROKE MY ARM! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT! LIKE I DONT HAVE ENGOUGH TO DEAL WITH I HAVE BULLIES 24-7 AND IM CALLED ALL THE NAMES IN THE CUSS WORD DICTIONARY!

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Dad

neither me nor my brother woke up on time for school. my stepmom I’m sure is convinced we coordinated it, assuming that either she or my dad would give us a ride, because my dad’s now layed off. she stomped out of the house. then my dad got angry because he felt like we were assuming too much for a ride (I was going to stay home and study) and he goes off and yells curse words and so does my little bro and eventually he’s threatening to punch my little bro in the nose, and he was crying and I was staying out of it because there’s nothing to do when my dad’s like that. he didn’t hit him, but fuck, what a way to start the day

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get towels from the clean stack and not just the ones sitting around

i just realized something today, as i got finished brushing my teeth i though hmm i need something to dry my toothbrush after rinsing it i also relized the wash cloth that strangely but convieniently showed up there befor i washed my face so i just assumed my gma put it out for decoration or courtesey and used it, but the day my gma doesnt put it there i get a fresh one from the closet thing with the clean towels i realized when i finished drying my used tooth brush on it and leaving it there when i was done and went to my room that maybey my grama did that same thing every morning and i was wiping my face wiping my mouth rubbing on my face when i washed it that my gma used it

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